When the attraction began I am not clear. The warm soapy water went on smooth. My fingertips help all the wonder of what was on the other side. You were my hero. You treated me as if I were a prize to be won. All the negatives were directed towards you. All my hopes and dreams of the perfect image shattered. All were tainted, bet ever present, then not fulfilled.
Why would I be given this damn desire to obtain perfection? It’s been celebrated that the risk takers of this world are the envy of the norm. They are amused by the different, the daring. This was my first experience to the other feelings.
My only purpose in building the tree house was to have a sanctuary. A shelter from the storms. At times, I believed that the world would just stay on pause long enough for me to breathe. On other times, I would just hope that I wasn’t missed at all. The only thing that really mattered was that whatever happened in our hideaway was held secret. This was something that was ours alone. If only the secrets were unfoiled, then maybe the later shame would have been so strong to stop all this madness now. The secrets were kept. This gave me the reins to tame this wild desire, and let there be no limits. Only the rolling clouds and thunderstorms beckoned my call. Furthering the daring flame that boiled inside.
I walk out into a field, hot and sticky from the persistent heat, and the windless summer skies. Pausing for a while, I think of the past, and all that I’ve learned to bring me to today. We are all wondering if what we do is right. We are all not sure if we will be ridiculed around the next corner.
That feeling of the warm bath endures. The security of the tree house remains, and if I think for long enough the world is taking a pause. The sky is turning black. A couple of big drops hit my face. You know? Rain is in the forecast. Good. Maybe I’ll get soaked. The warm water goes on so smooth.